Stubborn, With a Capital S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N

Granny refuses to take her pain medication.

She was prescribed Anaprox (high dosage naproxen sodium) for swelling and Lortab (hydrocodone, nice) for pain. I was to pick up the prescriptions for her yesterday morning, but she stopped me.

Granny: I don't think you'll be able to get my prescriptions.

Me: Why not?

Granny: Huh?

Me: Why don't you think I can get your prescriptions?

Granny: I can do without them.

Me: Granny, you really should take them...

Granny: I don't know what they're for, and that second one is nothing but dope.

Me: You say that like it's a bad thing. Aren't you in pain?

Granny: I heard the doctor saying I only should take them if I really need them. I can do without them.

Me: Fine, then suffer.

Turns out she overheard the doctor at the hospital questioning one of the prescriptions she takes on a daily basis, which it turns out is a drug for Parkinson's disease. Granny shakes badly but does not actually have Parkinson's. The doctor was asking why Granny's primary care physician keeps prescribing it when she doesn't have the disease.

So she called my mother, and after informing her that my mother is the one who looks terrible and belongs in a hospital, not her, my mother explained to her that she really needs to take the anti-inflammatory and pain medication so her body will relax enough to heal. She let me go get her medication but my mother told me this morning that she hasn't taken any of it. Uncle Sonny dropped off a wheelchair he had, and she's wheeling herself around the bottom floor in a flannel nightgown as we speak.

I just hope she leaves me some Lortab...